I posted this July 1st, but the readings at Mass today are all about the same thing... Our Good Shepherd -so I'm going to re-post it again.
Thank You, Jesus, for being such a Good Shepherd. +
So often we make the mistake of thinking that God is somehow like us in our thinking and ways of doing things. In reality, HE is the reality, the goal, the authentic one that our lives should be striving to imitate. I read this quote of St. Maximus and I reflect on Jesus, our battle-scarred Shepherd and I think, "I wish people would imitate my wounded One." Yes, humans have freewill and the unfortunate reality is that they use this freewill wrongly so often -they use it to make themselves look good and to harm the defenseless ones. They use freewill to control, to lie, to twist, to selfishly put-down or accuse... and Jesus needing pure love in this world has to leave people free so that they at least have the chance to choose to use freewill for love. They don't, many times.
But Jesus doesn't leave any soul entrusted to Him trapped alone. He sword-fights His way into our messy lives and disregarding the wounds, takes the blows that were coming our way upon His Own Face and Back. Yes, I feel the sting of other's selfish manipulation ... daily, even... but it would be WAY WORSE if my sweet Jesus didn't go before me in this mess and take the brunt of the blows on Himself. No, He cannot change the human heart that gets hard, that gets comfortable dominating others... only an individual soul can freely choose to accept the Love of the Father and change by itself. But He can (and does) climb into our difficult situations caused by other's sins against us (whether it be the sin of evil or the sin of their indifference to our plight) and He bleeds for us. Yes, my Jesus bleeds for me... He bleeds to soften the hearts of those who have decided to ruin me (every life has encounters with such people) -and He shelters me with His rod and staff beating away those who come against me. Yes, He 'cannot' change my plight without forcing those who have chosen sin and selfishness (He can invite them, but not force them to respond to His Love), but He can (and does) climb into the mess of things and give it meaning -give it His meaning. He can sit by me and say to the world, "I'm actually on her side in this mess... what you do to her, you do to Me." He frees me.
Yesterday I was pondering on a situation again wondering, "Where is my defense, Lord? It feels like lies, jealousy, power, money, control, gossip is ahead in this arena..." And He responded again in my heart, "My Love defends you. When you die, you get to be closer to Me than any of them... because you were right, they were wrong and you suffered injustice heroically with Me." Wow. That's powerful stuff. I got to be the sheep ... Its amazing who God raises up sometimes to be His Voice and Heart. In fact, yesterday, Jesus was my encouraging Shepherd through the voice of a child. I spent some of the day yesterday helping BJ re-stain their deck. At one point praying I thought, "I hope I'm doing this right. Oh Jesus, why have they (not BJ, 'they' being the proverbial 'they' of people who have been mean to me in the world) beaten me so badly that I even doubt my staining abilities." Immediately, as if an answer to my interior prayer, BJ's oldest son Luke came around the corner to encourage me. He yelled, "Aunt Mary, that looks great! You're doing such an awesome job! Do you want a drink? What great work!" Yes, my little Luke was the voice of Jesus encouraging me. A spiritual director 20 years ago told me that I had a soul that needed a ton of affirmation and that its just the way I was sensitively made. Jesus somehow told my little nephew Luke that yesterday. The Holy Spirit is amazing. Anyway, just a little more reflection on the powerful and awesome love of Jesus manifesting Himself in different ways. Thank you, Jesus... I trust in You. +
"When Jesus found wandering in the mountains and hills the one sheep that had strayed from God's flock of a hundred, He brought it back to the fold, but He did not exhaust it by driving it ahead of Him. Instead, He placed it on His Own Shoulders and so, compassionately, He restored it safely to the flock."
-St. Maximus the Confessor
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